He'd even sit with her in the pub and have a couple of warm-up drinks while she waited for a new date to arrive. 'On that day of the wedding, when everyone around me was saying how lovely he was, I suddenly thought they were right.She described him to other friends as 'not very exciting'. It was like an epiphany.' Most psychologists would say that was unusual.
And often a crisis highlights the strengths of a person and renders them compatible (which is why some widows marry lifelong comrades because they've provided support in the depths of sadness).
Also, as you move into middle age, you start to consider the question, "Do I want to get old with you?
" If you have a trusting friendship, the answer will more likely be yes.' It was a breach of trust that made Natasha Miller, now 39, completely revaluate her approach to commitment.
Mo Kurimbokus, a relationship counsellor, says, 'Think of it like foreplay.
All the time you're being friends, you're learning about each other.